I don't know which ancient, pagan spirit I offended, but I am sorry and someone needs to help me appease the spirit and makes things right. Here is the deal, I don't know why, by I have terrible luck with tires. I'm driving for Lyft in Park City, UT for the Sundance Film Festival. Park City is a small ski resort town that is over run once a year by several thousand people showing their films along with those who are there to view the films and catch star sightings. A Lyft driver is supposed to make big money on those days and I'm definitely in on that action. Except that for no reason that I can fathom; no accident, no pot hole, no curb hit, my tire decides to go flat. Imagine if you will the scene. A small town in the mountains. Way too many people and their cars for the roads. I'm driving down Deer Valley Drive to drop off a fare at the hub on main street when the tire goes flat. It's bumper to bumper traffic and so very slow going. There is no shoulder to pull off onto, just a large snow bank. I have no choice but to keep going forward until I can pull off into an alley that has been reserved for the bus's. This is by no means my first flat tire. My history in tire mishaps has many chapters. About 2 months ago I was driving my sister's car in downtown Salt Lake City. For no reason that I can tell, again, the tire goes flat. In that adventure I messaged my sister on what was the number for her roadside assistance. She was like, um, you are your own roadside assistance. Everything you need to change the flat is in the back. I've never changed a flat tire so I got road side assistance out there to help me. When I brought the tire into the shop the be looked at, the side wall was deformed with no holes anywhere in the tire. No idea how it went flat or why the side wall gave out. Oh, and I was also giving a Lyft ride when that happened. I dropped off the fare, took a look at my tires cause it didn't sound right, and sure enough, flat. Awesome. Also about 2 months ago my brother-in-law let me use his car while he is on deployment. I didn't check the car over before accepting it. Found out in the first snow storm of the year that his two back tires were bald. Zero tread. Ass hat. Last year I bought an RV. Two of the four back wheels blew out. One just after I bought the RV and was assured it passed inspection. The second just after I had a pre-trip inspection done to the RV and yup, was assured it was in good condition. The next two I replaced before they could blow. These two blow outs were because the tread was dangerously low and while I was driving at 70 mph on the highway. Fun. In Hawaii I bought a Scion. Within two weeks I had an epic blow out where the side wall of the tire looked like there was a bomb inside of the tire. No idea why. Just bought it from a dealership who assured me the car was in good condition. So much fun. A couple of years ago I was on vacation in Florida with my then husband. The rental car, when we picked it up, looked fine. We took lots of pics of the dings and scratches. Neither of us checked the tread on the tires. Just like we also didn't pop the hood and checked the fluid levels. Turns out, one of the tires was so bald the wires were coming out. We took the car back, got an upgrade as an aplogy, and a few weeks later a bill for the tire. Because of course they have an extensive inspection process and would never let a car out with that kind of tire damage. Fun fun fun times. When I was in college I was in New Haven, CT. I made sure to be good about have two sets of tires, summer and snow. I was also good about getting them swapped on time. One year I go to take my tires in to be swapped, mind you they had been sitting in the storage cage of my apartment complex since being removed from the car at the last swap, and I'm told by the tire guys that they can't put on the tires that I had brought in. There were nails and all kinds of crap that made the tires unusable. And yup, they were in shit shape when the tire guys showed them to me. And yup I had to buy a whole new set. No idea who fucked me over on that adventure. In all of these tire misadventures I can say I have never changed a tire on my own. In New Haven while in college I got a flat while driving through a residential neighborhood. It was morning and there were parents walking kids to school. One dad stopped to help me when he saw me pulling the jack and donut out of my trunk. I didn't know what I was doing but I started pulling out the things I knew I would need and I was going to try to figure it out as I go. Thank you super dad for stopping to help me! The result of today's flat was the tire had to be replaced, which I am hoping lyft/hertze will reimburse me on like they are supposed to. (I'm renting this car) There was some kind of crack in the tread area that is not a normal puncture such as from a nail and the inside was shredded from the rim. I lost 4 hours of prime driving time. And I had to drive through the canyon at 45 mph - that may not mean much to you if your not familiar, but trust, it sucks - to get back to Salt Lake in order to get to a tire store. So there we are. Clearly I have pissed of a deity, or someone has cursed me, or the universe is dead set on me changing my own tire at least once. Whatever the case, I need sage, holy water from the springs of the mountain, and the blessing of a priestess of old to turn things around. 'Cause honey, this shit is getting old.
March 7, 2019 update: got a screw in my tire causing a slow leak. Didn't go flat, and did get it repaired for free. So that sucks but a little bit of an improvement.
July 2022
The tire misadventures containers. When I got evacuated back to the US from my Peace Corps assignment due to COVID-19, and subsequently made homeless, I was living out of my RV in California. I thought this would be a great time to go into the wild places and just chill.
So of course I get a huge rock stuck between the two duel rear tires which punctured a hole in the side wall of one tire. And I'm too far from civilization for road side assistance to reach my with the special jack that can lift an RV without it being crazy expensive. That's a whole crazy story that works out in the end.
I get a job working in southern Oregon, get a Jeep, and you guessed it - slow leak on one tire because of a foreign object puncture. The piece of metal that we took out of the tire was smaller then my finger nail.
I then go without tire troubles for a year and half. Mainly because I was without a car. I'm in Japan, been here for a year and change, and have been getting around by public transit. I then get the bright idea to buy a car. Day two of having the car and I get a flat when I take a turn, have to take the turn super tight because Japanese roads are too small sometimes to allow two cars to pass and stay in their own lanes, and I hit the curb. Tire go flat. Fuck fuck fuck.